thoughts from an ex-quasi-vegan

It seems that we (the people) are being treated like idiots. Fools, I say. The "green movement" and healthiest of the healthy are telling us not to eat any animal products. The body builders and actors are saying to eat PROTEIN--which they seem to only be able to get out of sweet animal flesh.


Pick a side! Or be the lazy, fatso that you obviously are!

Dear Veganism,

In the last two weeks, I have consumed four hamburgers. FOUR!

What if I told you that I maybe ate two hamburgers in the entire last year? How about if I told you that during these last two weeks, I also ate a french dip sandwich, pork burritos, and a mini hot dog?

People!

For about 14 years, I have toyed around with veganism. In other words, I tried it before it was cool. Because, =I am so cool.= My father, the former cattle rancher, has called me "tree hugger" more than once... a year. It started out with not eating red meat. And then I didn't eat any meat. Then no milk, but I did eat poultry and fish. Then I would throw it all out the window and eat anything and everything.

About twelve years ago, after gaining the newlywed nineteen, I read a book and promptly stopped eating red meat, dairy, and sugar. (This was after trying the Atkins diet for 1.3 days.) I maintained this diet for over a year, and then I got pregnant.

Do you know what happens when you get pregnant? You crave foods, dangit. And all I wanted was hamburgers, ice cream, and Peanut Butter Cap'n Crunch. See you later, controlled diet.

I've read great books supporting veganism--this one is practically the food bible in our house. It is an incredible book based on countless studies, and happens to coincide nicely with my religious views on diet.

Then two years ago I thought that I could control some crazy body malfunctions with diet. So I didn't eat meat, dairy, sugar, or gluten. But then I'd feel all self-loathing and pathetic and I would eat some sugar. If I had to choose one of those four items to eat, sugar should have been last. It wasn't. =Why was I not feeling any better?=

I have a very intense part of my personality. It is what I call the "Feast or Famine" (said in a deep game show announcer voice--try it again). This doesn't just apply to food. Cleaning, crafting, writing, reading, whatever. I'm all in or I'm all out. You can see how this is not good for a long-term "way of life"; or as normal people call it, DIET.

So I roller coaster like the best of 'em. 

I had a boyfriend in college (seriously, again?! oh yes, my friend. any chance I can get) who--when we were discussing food and eating--said that it was not sustainable nor practical to remove an entire food group from your diet (barring severe allergies, obviously). Sure, you would lose weight. For how long, though?

Many times since I've wondered about that statement and I was determined to prove him wrong. It never lasted. Just like our love.

(Oh the college loves. I only bring them up as often as possible to remind myself that I was quite the catch back then. It's a good thing to remember. Yours truly was highly desirable. There was even one young man who desperately tried to convince me to break up with my then-fiance. He [not the old fiance] is now proudly gay. I'm not reading into that one at all.)

So, veganism. Right.

I'm over it. Just like last year when I decided that completely removing dairy was not a long-term ideal. Moderation. I don't drink milk. I like almond milk, coconut milk, even soy milk (for a while I was afraid of getting soy-related cancer). Use them all, I say. Only use cheese when I really want it. 

I still would consider myself a sparing dairy user. But I don't sweat it when there is some. I am now adopting that into my meat regime. If my body says "HAMBURGER", which it did many times last week, I will feed it a hamburger. If it says, "CHILI CHEESE HOT DOG", I will probably get a salad. It's about being smart and enjoying the blessed word
M-O-D-E-R-A-T-I-O-N!

Sugar is obviously of the devil. But removing it completely is also never going to happen.

Finally, I am at my point. Sayonara Veganism. Good luck to all those who wish to partake. For me, I will be grateful for the information I learned from you, like beans and dark greens are the best protein you can get. I will use that often. I will appreciate that animals have rights and to choose wisely those that I eat. I am all for less hormones. I have learned much from my foray into your exclusive club, Veganism, but I think I need to formally bow out. It's just not gonna happen for me. 

Thanks for the memories,

a